Before and After


It’s difficult to remember what my life was like before I became a mom.  The closest I can come to relaying what it was like is to relay what it wasn’t like, based on the way it is now.

I never had to get up in the middle of the night –numerous times– to feed a hungry baby.  Nor did I begin my day making breakfast and packing lunches for anyone other than myself. Not once did I have to clean up other people’s messes, wipe someone else’s bottom, wear someone else’s throw-up on my shirt or put off taking a shower. I never had to be responsible for another life. I did not have to be a teacher, preacher, cheerleader or police officer. My job description did not include being a tutor, taxi driver, maid or cook.   And I certainly never had to share my food, couch space or my time.

But I also never received such a glorious and endless supply of hugs, snuggles and kisses. No one ever made me colorful Crayola cards or sweet, fingerpainting pictures. I never had anyone collect such beautiful golden dandelions for the vase on my sink or present me with so many opportunities to smile and laugh and thank God every single day.  I never before had the chance to watch my heart walk on tip-toe and dance and jump and twirl outside my body. Never before was I  blessed with hearing the words, “I love you, Mommy.” But that was before.  I’ve lived quite happily ever after.

2 Responses so far.

  1. Kat Goggin says:

    But remember before, when we longed, oh sooooo longed, for all you are experiencing now? Longed for, without knowing, then, just how much that new little precious soul would actually change your life and how absolutely and unconditionally you’d fall in love? We all KNOW we will, but when it happens, we could NEVER have foreseen just HOW much and HOW deep that love would bury itself into our hearts and flow through our lives. It is magnificent.

  2. Michelle says:

    Absolutely. Best feeling in the world. It is hard for me, sometimes, to remember what life was like before. I suppose some might consider that “living in the moment.” Which I think is a good thing! –Not that I don’t remember my childhood or friends or college or moments in my career, etc. I have wonderful memories of all that. But now I’m creating new memories for myself and my children. And the past feelings of longing and sadness have been replaced with such joy and contentedness.

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